hey mom and dad i met a girl today
no not in class, it was on the way back home
and there's something i think i should tell you
something you guys might not understand
she's got this dietary thing
the kids are mean they laugh and sing
and i know it's not her fault
but she says there's nothing wrong at all
she eats cans
with her hands
soup or soda doesn't matter
i dump them out i know she'd rather
she eats cans
with her hands
there are weirder things in life
so she says to me
i guess there's worse things i could be
than a guy who's girlfriend likes to eat
the things i keep with me
in case of world war 3
oh by the way
i think i forgot to mention
she's beautiful and brilliant
i'm convinced she'll save the world
but yesterday
i listened to a lecture from some guy
who's still convinced her dad's a goat
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